Habit and Happy, etc...

May I make a confession?  I Struggle with this whole blogging thing.  I have never felt terribly eloquent in my wiring.  I fret over what to include in my posts.  I write then delete, write, delete, write delete.  Today, for example I am struggling with whether to talk about how hot it has been here for the last two weeks, and that our AC went out, but hat I have fared well, and am glad that the temps outside have cooled.  Do I talk about staying in the bus because it has air?  Do I share that my kids are in camp this week and I am getting a lot of alone time?  What can I share here that will capture the imagination of potential readers and dew them in so that they recommend me to their friends, and my readership grows, and I am loved by millions?  
So, I default to showing my art....
I have some new stuff!  Aren't they nice?

Big Day

January third is a big day. It is full of all kinds of importance.

Today is the tenth birthday of my muse, my heart walking around outside my body, my son. I am woefully unprepared for today. I am reeling with the thought that we have entered double digits. He is almost a tween! I so desperately wish I could have one more day with the five year old Adam, the seven year old Adam, the infant Adam. I want to relive the day he found his toes at five months old laying on his back on my bed, chubby arms and legs in the air. He grabbed his piggies and the biggest grin ever spread across his face. I am not ready for hormones and the possibility that he might not like me much very soon. I pray that we will stay close and that he will always lean into me.

Today is also the first weekday of the New Year. I am ready for the return to normalcy. I am ready to pounce on 2011, bring it into submission and make it my year. I know, it is just another day and we can make life changes on any day of the year, but doesn’t this time just feel pregnant with possibility? Who will I be this year? 2010 was a good year for me. I did not accomplish everything I had hoped, but I moved forward, I did better. Will 2011 be better? That is my intention.

I start every year with the intention to be better organized and more self-disciplined. I made progress in that area in 2010 by waving the white flag in the area of housekeeping and hiring a cleaning service. I hate to clean, I stink at it, my back won’t allow me to do it for long stretches at a time, and I have better things to do with my time. Hiring a service was one of the smartest moves I made last year. The release from guilt alone makes it worth the cost! This year is no different. I know my greatest challenges lie in the areas of self-discipline and organization. My intention for 2011 is to waste less time on stupid stuff and invest more time in worthy pursuits. Stupid stuff means facebook surfing and online games. Really! How many of us are sucked into that black hole on a daily basis?

Here is my list of worthwhile pursuits-

• time with God
• time with my kids
• creative time
• reading books
• rest
• exercise

How about you? What are your intentions for this new year?

Home

This is home.

This is where I hunker down with my family and love them until forever.

This is a place of peace and chaos,

and joy, always joy.

This is where I create, dream, cry, sing, dance and rest.

It is not perfectly clean and neat. It doesn't house all the latest gadgets and nicest furnishings.

I like it that way.

Photography and Life

Life is good. I mean really good. I am doing life in a wonderful way these days. That is why I am so scarce here. My blog is suffering, but my family is thriving. A worthy trade say I.

So, a friend is doing a collaborative photography project. My interest is piqued. I am showing more interest in photography lately because it is a means to be creative with less stuff in more manageable time segments. I can feed my need without getting overwhelmed I guess. So, I decided I would join in Chrysti's project... at least for this round.
The prompt was "decorate." Here is my response...

Moving

I am sitting amongst piles and boxes, surrounded by mixed emotion. We have lived here for about four years. Adam was two when we moved here. Messa came home to this place. But now we are leaving. The last time I did this, I was glad to move on. This place has been different. But, it is not where we need to be right now. So, we are moving in to town.


Town means a small rental house on a small lot with neighbors closer than I care for. It also means friends for my children to play with, and short drives to their interests and activities. No wild turkey or coyote will cross my yard, but I can get to the downtown historic district for a cup of coffee at Flynnes and first rate people watching in three minutes. Matt will be able to come home for lunch, and in the evenings he will be home at 5:35, not 6:15. There is a little park right up the road that the kids and I can walk to. I can take the dog, and give her the exercise she needs (me too!) My studio space is in the sun porch on the back of the house. I have lot's of natural light, and I will be able to work late into the evening without feeling isolated like I do in my current studio, which is in a seperate building.
So, we sacrifice. We compromise. We know that in a very short time, the kids will be grown and on their own and we can find a spread somewhere that offers the peace and beauty we have loved here.
Now, don't get me started on the whole packing thing....